Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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