i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Randomize
