I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
