I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
