I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize