know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize