"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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