why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
