Tell her she can't have a vagina
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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