I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
