Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
