sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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