youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
