He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
