awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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