the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
What drink are we having for lunch?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
