Who wears a wallet chain?!
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
