why didn't you poke me back
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize