Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
