your room smells of hookers.
And success
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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