That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize