And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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