im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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