oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
