Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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