I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize