so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
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Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
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Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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