Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Everclear isn't food dammit
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
