Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
It was confusing and full of hummus
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
