Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
