it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
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