Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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