I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
