I'm lost and stupid without you.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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