Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
