dude i'm inner monologue high
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
