is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
