Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
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She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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