She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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