please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
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I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
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Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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