alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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