WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
