Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
