Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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