I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.