There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
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I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
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Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?