just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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