No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Randomize
