drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
