the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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