This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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