Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
