doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
