in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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